


Buried deeply

by Miss_Mahlzahn



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Gen, Introspection
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-14
Updated: 2019-07-14
Packaged: 2020-06-28 07:36:32
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 294
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19807687
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Miss_Mahlzahn/pseuds/Miss_Mahlzahn
Summary: Crowley remembers his love for Her, this all-encompassing connection. He still loves, but it’s the bitter, grieving love of a child betrayed.





	Buried deeply

**Author's Note:**

> First time posting here. Also, not a native speaker.

Crowley’s the one who has been freed from any inner constraint. Sure, he has to adhere to his side’s customs, but that’s all it is: customs.  
  
In his mind, he is free to judge. And he judges. Oh, he judges. Especially Heaven. They’re supposed to be the good guys, right?  
  
Aziraphale is the one who is bound by loyalty, duty and fear. Oh so easily could one Fall, but worse, how could he possibly risk to hurt Her, whom he loves deeply, achingly, desperately, with complete and indestructible faith?  
  
Crowley remembers this love he once shared, this all-encompassing connection. He still loves, but it’s the bitter, grieving love of a child betrayed.  
  
He never talks about this to Aziraphale, but of course the angel knows. Sometimes he aches to comfort Crowley: That She still loves him, never left him, will always be there, even if Crowley cannot feel Her anymore, because Aziraphale can.  
  
But the angel doesn’t dare to. So fragile, so very thin is the layer of crumbling contentment that time has strewn over the rock-hard bed of anger in Crowley’s soul. He hopes, he prays, that maybe the demon will someday feel the echo of Her love in the angel’s deep affection.  
  
And yes, sometimes the mutual love between them is nearly enough, engulfs Crowley completely, and then he allows himself to hope that maybe She hadn’t truly abandoned him, that She did not cut him off like a withered bough after all.  
  
After Tadfield, oh … after Tadfield he remembers, he remembers his plea to her, to spare the world, and he remembers his faith in the angel and the angel’s faith in Her Love.  
  
And then, finally, his hope, this tiny shimmering pearl buried deep in his heart, becomes a seed…


End file.
